YOU

I miss YOU but you never knew...
I love YOU but you just can't feel it...
I hurt for YOU...
I would cry for YOU...
I don't wanna lose YOU...
I care for YOU a lot...
I'm happy for YOU...
YOU never knew YOU're hurting me too...
I will always ran to YOU...
YOU taught me the meaning of happiness & sadness...
of pain & healing...of love & hate...
YOU made my life complete...
YOU always listen...and I always give in.
YOU & me are opposites...but WE'RE perfect for each other.

BLISS

ewwwwwww........ANG SAYA-SAYA KO....hehehehe

WE WON 1st price sa contest!!! worth of ****drum rolling****

$5,000!!! hmmm...san ko kya pede gamitin yon..kc actually, di naman transaferable to cash...pero pede na pan-shopping! hehe..tamang tama mag babaksyon na ko this coming MAY!!! yahuuuuuuu!!!

GOD IS REALLY REALLY GOOD! hayyyyy... kita mo nga naman of all "my reklamo's" he has something naman pala for me! HE made me feel better totally!

THANK YOU LORD!!! =D (sorry for all the reklamo) */me yuko ulo

I'm tired of everything that has been happening lately...don't know what's goin on with me...
I'm tired of hurting...
I'm tired of pain...
I'm tired of thinking...
I'm tired of me hiding my feelings!...
I'm tired of "explaining" things...
arggghhh... it just kills me!
People may see me strong when actually I am the most weakest of the weak!!!
I just felt so misunderstood...
I felt that nobody's listening...
nobody sees me!
nobody knew me!...the REAL me!
I'm so tired of feeling all of these! *GOD help!*

I'm such a coward!

I don't know how it started...I just woke up one day and VIOLA!!! I'm feeling all of these! all emotions kept pouring in...It's so hard! even harder than I expected! I can't even handle my own self now...F**k!
Good thing is I'm good at wearing MASK. Thanks for that "gift".

But I'm tired!

I wanted to scream as hard as I can...run as fast as I can...


uhmm....GOD what's the sense of me being a Psychologist?!



Current song: Warrior is a child

Lately I've been winning battles left and right
But even winners can get wounded in the fight
People say that I'm amazingI'm strong beyond my years
But they don't see inside of meI'm hiding all the tears

Chorus:
They don't know that I come running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while(Look up for His smile)
'Coz deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child (Aahhh)
Unafraid because His arrow is the best
But even soldiers need a quiet place to rest
People say that I'm amazingI never face retreat, oh no
But they don't see the enemies
That lay me at His feet

Chorus:
They don't know that I come running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while(Look up for His smile)
'Coz deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child (Aahhh)
They don't know that I come running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while(Look up for His smile)
'Coz deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child (Aahhh)

Dr. Phil

Syettt...I think I need to see Dr. Phil T_T
Napanood ko kase sya...DANG! na "struck" ako sa kanya! Ang galing!

Kung ako cguro yung client nya naku...ewan ko na lang...cguro nanigas nako...hehehe
kase ba naman pinapanood ko pa lang noh...lahat ng sinasabi nya swak n swak sa mga client nya...
nakakaiyak pa yung dialogue nya "I'M NOT GONNA HATE YOU...I'M GONNA HELP YOU!"

Siya kaya may problema din kaya sya */hmmm curious lang
kase diba ang dami na nyang hina-handle na problema...yung sariling problema kya nya naha-handle pa kaya nya...di kaya sya naaburido sa buhay nya? */me isip (nakakarelate ba ko jan!)
kase sa totoo lang ANG HIRAP MAGING "SPONGE"!!!

hay naku ever relate talaga ko ha..hehehe

But I really admire him ang galing talaga!!! hayyy...when am I gonna meet him!?!

sana bawat buhok na nalalagas...
sana kasama don ang mga problema ko...
ang mga iniisip ko...

Pakiramdam ko habang humahaba buhok ko...
humahaba din problema ko... T_T
magpakalbo na lang din kaya ako?! */me isip
hmmmmm......

WCG 510

howel....the car! baw!

So many memries' tsk tsk tsk...
so many gimiks....
so many "kalokohans"...

It didn't change AT ALL...maliban sa owner....well, doesn't matter. Nung nakita ko lang may mga bagay lang akong naalala =' (
*/me naiiyak naiiyak
(nakaw lang 'tong pic actually..hehe wag kayong maingay!)

tsk tsk tsk....the car baw!

"Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too---even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling"

~Tuesday with Morrie~

Anger Management

argggghhhhh......hanuvah!!!! nagdududgo na utak ko kakaisip......AYOKO NA!!!
sabayan pa ng ama ko....haaayyyyyy....
ANO BA'TONG NARARAMDAMAN KO!!! nakakainis na...gusto ko na sumabog!!!! hangsakit sa ulo!
daming tumatakabo sa utak ko...
ikaw!
ako!
tayo!
siya!
sila!
lahat sila!
buong mundo na nga ata...
hayyyy......*/me hinga malalim

pero in fairness ha sa tanang buhay ko ngayon lang me nag-isip ng ganito...siguro kaya ganito kase hindi ako sanay...dahil sa tanang buhay ko hindi pa ko na mroblema ng problema kaya hindi ako sanay....waaaaaa.... (hehe, natawa ko sa sinabi ko ha!)
you know "the-happy-go-lucky" type of girl...I miss my old self *sniff* *sniff*
I miss being worry free!!! I miss smiling "naturally" ung smile na totoo...yung hindi PLASTIK!

Hayyy...wala kase akong magawa...I was trapped (sa ganitong pagkakataon/ sa ganitong situwasyon)!!! parang lahat ng posible dati nagiging IMPOSIBLE ngayon! hayyy...where is the old me?! */me takip mukha
may gusto kaseng akong gawing mga bagay-bagay pero HINDI KO MAGAWA!!! may gusto akong makita pero hanggang PANAGINIP lang sila! */me inhale-exhale

*/ me inhale-exhale uli (habang kumakain ng ice cream) baka sakali maging COOL uli ako!

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

hanggang dito na lang muna nilalamig na kase ko sa ice cream na kinain ko...pero mainit pa din ang ulo ko! mwahehe.....shaks!!! I think I need a Psychatrist!!! watcha think?! =P

Sana lang LORD maging OK pa din ang lahat! May your will be done!

It's a SIGN!!!

system time 7:40pm

shaks!!! I ask for a sign last night...I've asked for a butterfly...kase nainggit ako ke Rustom sa PBB...tsaka I wanna try If signs are for real nga...so there nga dibuh...
tas kanina while I was brushing my teeth (sa bathroom)...napati-ngala ako and I saw this very tiny creature =)









akala ko nga patay (na nakadikit sa pader)...kase di siya gumagalaw...pero nung ginalaw ko sya lumipad naman!!!
GOD is this the sign na hinihingi ko...hehehe...if so, then, OK na! no questioning anymore!
I asked for a butterfly kase napaka rare ng butterfly dito, and HINDI sa loob ng bahay huh!...I was expecting sana sa labas..kaya lang naisip cguro NYA na baka di ko mapansin pag sa labas @ makalimutan ko na humingi nga pala ko sign...hehe
and I never thought na ganito kabilis yung sagot NYA!...*/me iyak (tears of joy)

GOD is really good! =)
now mejo I'm feeling ok na...
Thank you po!

Shopaholic Ties the Knot

Just finished reading that book...ahh....ang galing nung ending...with all the struggles sa wedding preps it ends up well & perfect pa rin...Cguro nga I just have to do the things I REALLY WANTED...I just have to decide what's good & what's best for me...hehehe (Am I talking serious here?!) Na inspired lang talaga ko =P

But I get jealous sa ending...*/ me imagine
kase ba naman yung honeymoon nila they'll travel ALL OVER THE WORLD!!! gawd!!! sana magawa din namen yon */me imagine uli... yung kameng 2 lang. hmmm.....I wonder *winks*

I was thinking na nga of Honeymoon spot...should we go abroad (HK particularly, pinakamadali kase puntahan eh) or sa aking motherland??? (particulary beach resort, the ever popular BORA, bohol or palawan) hehehe nasa honeymoon na agad utak ko...eh wala pa nga kameng na preprepare about the wedding talaga! F***k!


"jitter" is attacking again.....arggggghhh...But i'll try to relax...*/me inhale-exhale...
ayoko nga magka-lines! hehe

My Escape!

These stuff are my "friends" pag may sapot ang utak ko...
@ least kahit sandali nakakalimot ako...hehe (great escapist buh!)

With books kase gumagana ang imaganitaion ko and the "sapot" disappear even for a while...(BUT with regards to the book that I was reading lalo ako nagkaka "jitter" @ the same time na-e-excite sa wedding plus the PRESSURE hehe)...
and yeah, I still have 4 more batches of books to read after this one!!!
I'm looking forward na sa mga yon!

With my i-pod naman, well, kakawala din ng problema...
kaka-relax, especially pag FULL volume yung tipong mababasag na yung eardrum ko sa sobrang lakas..haha
(relaxing para sakin bakit buh!) =P And I never ever listen to senti songs or love songs! er... baka lalo ako mabaliw...so, para OK I only listen to somekind of "Angsty" songs...

With the mixed of both...MAS OK!!! wala na kaseng paglalagyan yung iisipin ko...bwahahaha...So, ginagawa ko sila usually ng sabay =) listening at the same time reading!!! Kase I found out that it is very effective eh....hehe
So whenever you see me like that..alam nyo na kung bakit!

Senti

gusto kong

umiyak

pero walang

luhang pumapatak.

gusto kong

sumigaw

pero wala na

rin namang magagawa.

gusto kong

magalit

pero para ano pa?

at bakit pa?

Ang hirap mag-panggap

na hindi ako nasasaktan.

Ang hirap isipin

na wala lang para

sa akin ang lahat.

Ang hirap gawin

na kalimutan ang

lahat-lahat.